Also for this evening, here is the link to a video I made for directing class. It's about our view of God and how limited it is. I love how it turned out :)
Mighty.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Settling
During the last 6 months here in Michigan and at Compass College, I've learned more about myself than I have ever before. I have changed so much in who I am, how I carry myself, what I see myself as. Because of the ever present reality that is Facebook in my life, I see pictures of myself in high school, at Ecola last year, and on SMT. And strangely enough, the person I see in those pictures is not the same person I see in the mirror. Maybe that's because I didn't have the pathetic excuse for a beard then I have now, but I'm pretty sure it runs deeper than that. But one big thing that has stuck itself out to me recently is my ever present desire not to settle.
First off, I will not settle for a 'normal' faith in God. My soul desire in my life and in my prayers is to be more than just an average joe Christian. Too many Christians are stagnant in their faith, lukewarm. I don't want to be that. Revelation 3:16 says "So, because you are lukewarm- neither hot or cold- I am about to spit you out of my mouth." I don't know exactly what that means or entails, but whatever it is, I don't want any part of it! I want to be a man after God's own heart. I pray for that as often as I think of it, which is probably at least every day. And God shows me more and more how He is doing that in my life every day. I'm not perfect, I won't be until I get my new body when we are with Him in Eternity, but I strive to run the race as well as I can, even though He has to help me off the ground when I stumble everyday. I'm so thankful that we have such a loving God!
Second, I won't settle for anything less than the beautiful woman God has personally ordained to ultimately be my wife. I know that God has placed in my heart the desire to get married one day, to have a wife to love and support, and to have a wife that will love and support me. He knows that I will need it in the rough career I have ahead of me. I pray for her often, that she is being molded into the woman after God's own heart, a "P31" if you will. (Proverbs 31:10-31) And I know that she will be the fit for me, and I for her, but only when the time is right for us to either meet, or realize that we've known each other all along. While she will have a strong relationship with the Lord and a strength that I will need, I know that she will be incredibly beautiful. It's something that's been programed into me: a desire for beauty. I've been told here that that makes me shallow, that I look at the outside too much. Is that true? Possibly, especially in my immaturity now. But outer beauty, while inner beauty outweighs outer, is still very much a factor for me, probably because I was raised on the west coast and the way we view relationships is so different from one end of the US to the other. So, what I'm trying to say is that I won't settle for anyone but the beautiful woman God has been molding just for me.
Third, I won't settle for an ordinary career. I'm not the type of person who can just be some guy in a sound department, or a desk clerk in a cubical. I want to be extraordinary. I want to participate in making films that change lives. I want to produce works that make people change their outlooks on life. I want to sore high in life and show off my Creator. I want to be all that God will allow me to be. I want to dream big and see to it that those dreams come true. I want to use the power given to me to grow various ministries, and to grow apart of various outreaches. I want to be abnormal to the environment I will reside in. I want to be peculiar. I want to make people ask, "What is this guy's deal? What drives him?" I want to show the world who Jesus Christ is by my actions and by what I do and by what I say. I want to be all that God's will allow me to be.
I am not one who will settle for less than these. I pray that God uses these ambitions for His glory, not mine.
"Not to us, but to Your Name be the glory."
First off, I will not settle for a 'normal' faith in God. My soul desire in my life and in my prayers is to be more than just an average joe Christian. Too many Christians are stagnant in their faith, lukewarm. I don't want to be that. Revelation 3:16 says "So, because you are lukewarm- neither hot or cold- I am about to spit you out of my mouth." I don't know exactly what that means or entails, but whatever it is, I don't want any part of it! I want to be a man after God's own heart. I pray for that as often as I think of it, which is probably at least every day. And God shows me more and more how He is doing that in my life every day. I'm not perfect, I won't be until I get my new body when we are with Him in Eternity, but I strive to run the race as well as I can, even though He has to help me off the ground when I stumble everyday. I'm so thankful that we have such a loving God!
Second, I won't settle for anything less than the beautiful woman God has personally ordained to ultimately be my wife. I know that God has placed in my heart the desire to get married one day, to have a wife to love and support, and to have a wife that will love and support me. He knows that I will need it in the rough career I have ahead of me. I pray for her often, that she is being molded into the woman after God's own heart, a "P31" if you will. (Proverbs 31:10-31) And I know that she will be the fit for me, and I for her, but only when the time is right for us to either meet, or realize that we've known each other all along. While she will have a strong relationship with the Lord and a strength that I will need, I know that she will be incredibly beautiful. It's something that's been programed into me: a desire for beauty. I've been told here that that makes me shallow, that I look at the outside too much. Is that true? Possibly, especially in my immaturity now. But outer beauty, while inner beauty outweighs outer, is still very much a factor for me, probably because I was raised on the west coast and the way we view relationships is so different from one end of the US to the other. So, what I'm trying to say is that I won't settle for anyone but the beautiful woman God has been molding just for me.
Third, I won't settle for an ordinary career. I'm not the type of person who can just be some guy in a sound department, or a desk clerk in a cubical. I want to be extraordinary. I want to participate in making films that change lives. I want to produce works that make people change their outlooks on life. I want to sore high in life and show off my Creator. I want to be all that God will allow me to be. I want to dream big and see to it that those dreams come true. I want to use the power given to me to grow various ministries, and to grow apart of various outreaches. I want to be abnormal to the environment I will reside in. I want to be peculiar. I want to make people ask, "What is this guy's deal? What drives him?" I want to show the world who Jesus Christ is by my actions and by what I do and by what I say. I want to be all that God's will allow me to be.
I am not one who will settle for less than these. I pray that God uses these ambitions for His glory, not mine.
"Not to us, but to Your Name be the glory."
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